Thou shalt always...

Enjoy:

The Eggplant is dead, long live the Eggplant.

Just an update- the damage estimate came in around $6,800- the car is a total loss. It's sad in a way, but I'm also glad. I'd rather have had that than have them try to fix the poor thing. I will miss it.

So the question is, what next? Will it be worth it to buy another car? With the move, we'll be in a city with a stellar public transit system, that's also flat enough and safe enough to bike on a regular basis. There's also the possibility of living out my dream and getting a scooter. The main reason, of course, would be to drive around the city going "Ciao!" :)

On a major upside note, with the money from the insurance company, I will be able to pay off my car loan, making me, for the first time since I was 18, debt free. What are the odds??? Can I get a woot?

My poor eggplant...

It was a delightful Sunday morning and I was heading home after a nice hour spent at my favorite pitch n' putt. I made the last turn onto my street, and the exact thought running through my head was "I should check the mail."

And all of a sudden, chaos. Some holy roller on her way home from the church down the street came barreling down the alley that intersects the street and didn't slow down or look. And she smacked right into me, turning me sideways, after which I ran into a beautiful '67 Mercedes that was parked on the street.

It happened so fast, yet right now, just a few hour later, all I can see when I close my eyes is that instant when I realized what was going on and I was instinctively trying to get the car under control. It's a wee bit harrowing.

I'm okay- my shoulder and neck hurt, which probably had more to do with the seatbelt than anything. Thankfully, nobody was in my passenger seat at the time. The car is likely a loss- the pillar between the two doors was pushed in a good three or four inches. Unfortunately, I won't get an estimate until tomorrow at the earliest.

Oh, for the uninitiated, "the eggplant" refers to the car being deep purple on the outside and sort of a tannish gey on the inside.

I'll miss it. :(

Patriot's Day shenanigans

You know, given the serious nature of my last post this morning, I should resist posting this, but I can't help it. Behold what happens when you mix early morning drinking, a baseball game with a noon start on a Monday, and a slice of pizza (you may want to watch it twice).

Taxes as a feminist issue

In honor of this being the day we're all supposed to settle up with our federal, state and local governments, I wanted to share this:

How the Income Tax System Shortchanges Women

By Martha Burk, Ms. Magazine
Posted on April 16, 2007, Printed on April 17, 2007
http://www.alternet.org/story/50522/

A longer version of this piece appears in the Spring issue of Ms. Magazine.

What comes to mind when we think of income taxes? Probably dread. Do we ever think women's issue? Not likely -- but we should. Taxes are something women and men face with unequal pain, let alone gain.

For example, a married couple faces a "marriage penalty" if their two incomes are similar and they file a joint return, since the second income (usually the wife's) is taxed at a significantly higher marginal rate than if she filed as an individual. But if a couple forgoes the wife's second income (or if one person's income is appreciably lower), they may pay less as joint filers than they would have as singles (the marriage "bonus"). Both situations can reduce the incentive for a married woman to work outside the home.

While business interests and churches have long had armies of lobbyists to influence tax policy, feminist influence has been minimal. That needs to change, and here are some recommendations:

• Get marital status out of the tax code. The basic tax-paying unit in the U.S. system is the "household" -- defined as married heterosexual couples or single individuals. We should redefine the tax unit to follow the model used in almost all other industrialized nations: Each taxpayer is treated as an individual regardless of household type. This would eliminate both the marriage penalty and the marriage bonus, and at the same time would no longer exclude gay or cohabiting couples.
• Increase the Child Tax Credit and apply it to all families with a payroll tax liability. Working poor women get very little help from the Child Tax Credit because it is tied to the amount they pay in income tax, which is low because their incomes are low. Yet many still have significant payroll tax bills for such things as Social Security and Medicare, so applying the tax credit to payroll taxes as well as income taxes would benefit them.
• Institute paid family leave, funded by unemployment taxes, with incentives for men to take leaves as well. We should not only have a national system of paid leave, but go a step further and emulate Sweden's system. There, in order to get the full benefit, each parent must take a turn at caregiving; the benefit doubles if the father takes his turn. This wouldn't help single mothers, but for married couples it would go a long way toward getting men to do their fair share.
• Remove the caps on Social Security taxes and give a Social Security credit for caregiving. While income-tax policies encourage women to stay home and take care of kids, Social Security then punishes them by entering zero for each year spent at home outside the paid workforce. That means a more meager retirement.
• Revoke favorable tax treatments for institutions that discriminate against women. Churches that openly discriminate against women enjoy billions of dollars in tax savings through exemptions from income and property taxes, not to mention benefiting from the largesse of contributors who deduct their contributions. In turn, these funds are used to undermine women's rights. Case in point: Catholic and Protestant churches were among the biggest contributors to anti-abortion referenda in the 2006 election.

If some of the changes we need seem far-fetched or impossible, remember this: There was a time when the income tax was highly controversial, and now it is universally accepted. We're a long way from a feminist tax policy, but we have to take the first steps before we can get there.

Martha Burk is the Money editor of Ms. magazine.

As Sufjan Stevens once said:

"I wanted a BUD light!" Oh, and there was something in there about Illinois, too. Anyways, the girl and I are set to become flatlanders, as they say. She loves the program, and the people in the program there are quirky in a good way. And I like the fact that even though it's a university town, it has a very mellow, laid back vibe. As cool as Austin is, the traffic and hustle of it wasn't something I was looking forward to.

Also, the week was full of signs. From the store downtown that stocks the deluxe Nancy Pearl action figure (with shooshing action!), to the Yuengling poster hanging at the bar we were at, to George Takei being on campus at the very same time. It is meant to be. She's going to be a midwestern librarian. :)

Plus, I'll get a heck of a lot more cycling done. Very little mountain biking, though. :)

Where would YOU live?

I'm going to throw this out to all y'all on the interwebs- given the choice between moving to lovely Champaign-Urbana, Illinois and Austin, Texas, where would you move, and why??? Do tell...

Haven't we had enough?

As we enter the fifth year of an interminable war, I'd like to have a quick reminder of why we're there. That's right it's two men with the smallest winkies known to man, you know em, you love em:




As of this morning, 3,197 American citizens have died as a direct result of the actions (or lack thereof) of these two men. Add to that countless Iraqis and soldiers from other countries, and you seriously have to wonder how they sleep at night.

Because the rest of us certainly aren't. We're occupied by thoughts of loved ones, friends, people we've known who have been sent off to fight to try and bring about the endtimes that these two geniuses dream of so breathlessly. We, as Americans, want our country to be safe. But we also want all of its citizens to be safe. Which means we don't want them being sent into harm's way ANY MORE.

Dubya. Turd Blossom. Listen to me. Enough is enough. We don't want your stinking war anymore. You can end it. Bring our citizens home.

Seriously.

Elstonville Update:

Here's a really good article, with an update on the situation. I'm glad the DA at least tried for the full amount of the fine, and really, really disappointed in the judge...

The fowl met a fate most unfair
By Jeff Hawkes, Staff
Intelligencer Journal

Published: Mar 13, 2007 12:55 AM EST

LANCASTER COUNTY, Pa. - The fearless hunters of Elstonville got caught in September launching arrows at tied-down turkeys.

The sportsmen's club called it a benefit. Three arrows for $12. Hit a bird and take it home to eat.

Sportsmen, I guess, don't do bake sales.

While I don't hunt, I appreciate hunting's appeal. Employing stealth, patience and knowledge of wildlife to bag game has got to be a thrill. But shooting at domestic turkeys that can't flee?

Even kids took aim at the confined gobblers. I can just hear parents: "Don't miss, Billy. Daddy wants a drumstick."

Makes you wonder what video games they let their kids play.

"Wait a minute, guys," you'd think someone at Elstonville Sportsman's Association would have said. "Should we be using trapped turkeys for target practice? Is that the image we want to project?"

At least after they were caught, you'd expect the sportsmen to be embarrassed. That wasn't the case.

Sour regret

Participants became upset when state troopers shut down the contest at the club's grounds in Rapho Township, and the club hired a lawyer to fight the animal-cruelty charges, characterized by one Elstonville board member as "propaganda." He told the press a couple months ago, "We have every confidence we're going to win this."

Well, they had confidence.

Club president Jesse Miller last Friday went before a district judge not to fight the charges but to start paying fines totaling $400.

Miller declined to answer questions afterward, but his lawyer handed me a 325-word statement that twice uses the word "regret."

Specifically, the club regrets the contest "reflected poorly" upon sportsmen and "tarnished our reputation as responsible citizens and sportsmen."

Expressions of regret are fine. Every little boy experiences regret when caught with a hand in the cookie jar. But expressing regret over losing face isn't the same as expressing contrition.

I searched for a crumb of remorse in the club's statement and came up empty. The tone is not apologetic, but self-righteous, practically defiant.

"We did not set out to cruelly mistreat the animals," the statement declares.

No, they set out to make money at the expense of helpless turkeys.

The club further says news accounts about the contest contained inaccuracies. Specifically, the club says, contest participants weren't drinking.

It helps their case to say they shot defenseless turkeys and were sober?

Shirking blame

The club says it now has a new rule forbidding contests with live targets, even though, the sportsmen can't help but point out, such contests "might be authorized by law."

The club in essence is saying it believes it did nothing wrong. That's clear in Elstonville's decision to plead no contest instead of guilty. Courts treat no contest the same as a guilty plea, the distinction being a no-contest plea admits to the facts but not to wrongdoing.

"They're not ... admitting to the allegations," confirmed attorney Michael Winters, who represented the club before the magistrate Friday.

When I pointed out the club's statement also offers no apology, Winters said, "The fact that they're not contesting these violations and have elected to enter pleas of (no contest) speaks for itself."

Indeed.

The club won't admit to wrongdoing but pats itself on the back for donating $12,000 a year to good causes and being "positive ambassadors for the sports we love."

"We look forward to ... restoring the community's confidence in our organization," the statement concludes.

Deciding not to execute more turkeys is a start. It's just too bad club members see themselves, and not the turkeys, as the victims.

Stop animal abuse in Lancaster County!

Recently, the media has reported on a live turkey shoot that took place at the Elstonville Sportsmen's Association (Manheim, PA) in September of 2006. This event was the definition of animal cruelty- the turkeys were bound to bales of hay and participants shot arrows at them. As a result of this event, the club has been charged with eight counts of animal cruelty, which could result in a whopping $4,000 in fines.

The Association is very proud of its community participation. The organizations the Association supports need to be made aware of their cruelty. If you'd like to help, below is a list of emails and a sample letter. Feel free to edit the sample letter to reflect your own thoughts. Please use "Elstonville Sportsmen's Association" as your subject line and BCC all of the email addresses at once.

Thanks for your help!


Sample Letter:

The Elstonville Sportsmen's Association website has identified your organization as a beneficiary of their charitable contributions.

The national media has reported that the Association was recently charged with eight counts of animal cruelty, which could result in up to $4,000 in fines, as a result of their September 2006 "turkey shoot" in Manheim, Pennsylvania. In the shoot, actual wild turkeys were staked to bales of hay and participants were given the opportunity to hit the animals with a bow and arrow. If the contestant drew blood, the bird was butchered and given as a prize. These turkeys were certainly not given a sporting chance.

I hope your organization will agree that this event was both cruel and inhumane. As a reputable organization in the community, please inform the Sportsmen's Association that their actions were unacceptable and consider declining future donations.

Thank you for your time.

(name)
(city, state)


Emails:
sallie.gregory@pa.nacdnet.net
clinn@schreiberpediatric.org
jgroff1@psu.edu
info@hospiceoflancaster.org
oberholb@police.co.lancaster.pa.us
conserve@lancasterconservancy.org
baronfootball@baronsfootball.com
cbpdchief@comcast.net

jlees@manheimtownshipems.org
police@manheimtownship.com
paridom@manheimcentral.org
president@mceabarontracks.org
zimmeys@ptd.net
jessica.pouchan@lls.org
sta212@dejazzd.com
bober@manheimfire.com
penntwpadmin@police.co.lancaster.pa.us
jahipple23@paonline.com
mandievans@comcast.net
erasmuso@bsamail.org
jcesare@specialolympicspa.org
geraldm@udservices.org


Organizations the Association Donates to:
Schreiber Pediatric Center, Children's Miracle Network, Hospice Of Lancaster County, Lancaster County Conservancy, Lancaster City Bureau Of Police, Barons Football Booster Club, Lancaster County Youth Conservation School, Cornwall Borough Police Department, The Manheim Athletic Association, Manheim Ambulance Association , Manheim Borough Police Department, Manheim Central Post Prom, Manheim Central Education Association, Manheim Community Farm Show, The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society, Mastersonville Volunteer Fire Department, Manheim Hope & Hose Volunteer Fire Company, Penn Township Police Department, Lancaster, PA Relay For Life, Pennsylvania Dutch Boy Scouts, Special Olympics Of Pennsylvania, United Disabilities Service

No, I can't explain it.

For some unknown reason, I'm obsessed with Pimp My Ride . I know, I know! It doesn't make any sense. I'm a pretty down to earth guy who generally rejects the trappings of materialistic society, but I just love the complete lack of practicality and completely unnecessary nature of the whole show. I mean, who needs thirty-five tee-vees in their car? Nobody! And that's why it should, nay, it MUST be done.

Don't judge me.

remember, kids...

toothpastefordinner.com

The blood boils, but there is hope.

Each time I watch a Keith Olbermann "Special Comment" segment, I find myself enraged at those in power, wishing I could do more to bring about change. But then I stop and think, wait, this guy's on national tv. And his audience is doubling and tripling as we speak. People are listening. And people are mad. And they're not going to fall for Gingrich's shit ever again:



I still have hope.

Mmmm... Poutine...

No, no, I'll wait- finish giggling.

Done? Good.

Now that you've gotten your minds out of the gutter, I'd like to go on a bit about the wonder that is poutine



I mean, imagine if you will, you cook up some frozen pommes frites, douse them in a healthy amount of brown gravy, and top it off with some delightful mozzarella- Follow Your Heart of Tofutti, it doesn't matter, and melt the cheeze.

Hardens your arteries just thinking about it, doesn't it? And as with all unhealthy vegan dishes, it's freakin delicious. :)

So as I said-

Mmmmm.... Poutine....

Well, lookit that.

It would appear that Mitt Romney, a.k.a. Mitt the Sh*t, 2008 presidential contender, talks out of both sides of his mouth when it comes to illegal immigration. To quote a famous southerner, "surprise, surprise, surprise!"

Nice knowing you, ya mormon nutjob. :)

Motivation!

The girl will be out of town this weekend, which makes me kind of sad. Weirdly, it'll be the first time I've slept alone in our place.

BUT! I've got me three gift swop packages to get out, and this will provide me ample time to do all of the mad scientist stuff that's been swirling around in my head surrounding the swop. Muhahaha!

:)

What Tarot is I?

Would this one were true. :)

You are The Wheel of Fortune

Good fortune and happiness but sometimes a species of
intoxication with success

The Wheel of Fortune is all about big things, luck, change, fortune. Almost always good fortune. You are lucky in all things that you do and happy with the things that come to you. Be careful that success does not go to your head however. Sometimes luck can change.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

(thanks to mishka for the timewaster :))

Buy Nothing Day!

There's nothing more sybolic of "America" than Black Friday. For the uninformed, Black Friday is the day after thanksgiving when the media tells us that every woman should be up before the crack of dawn and at her favorite store to be blessed by the retail gods, who see fit to throw some sort of cheap trinket their way.

Well, f*ck that. Adbusters has been organizing Buy Nothing Day for years now, and I think it's high time you participate. There are plenty of ideas on the website, including ways to have a Buy Nothing Christmas (imagine!).

So my request to you is to spend the next month celebrating with your loved ones the fact that you've made it (relatively) unscathed through another calendar year, and the future is boundless. And you don't need all that frickin consumeristic crap!

Banksy

The man, the myth, the legend, rocks Disneyland.

Today's life lesson...

Is that when you're trying to move past your feelings of anger, it's only going to make it more difficult when you're surrounded by people who have no interest in moving past their feelings of anger at the same target. Very difficult.

That is all.